Fear
Anyone who has a paralyzing fear of heights will tell you, if forced to choose between standing on a precipice for eternity, or Jumping... they will choose to jump. The thought of eternal fear is more horrifying than death.
I'm trying to decide if I'm more afraid of living out my existence fighting fear of Death, or fighting the fear of LIFE! I'm so afraid of failing, of being hurt, of hurting the ones I love most. I don't want to be a burden, I don't want to have to constantly hide what's inside. I'm so tired of standing on that precipice, fighting to stay instead of just jumping. If I jump, what will happen? Will I find LIFE OR DEATH?
The one certainty, is ... I'm here, on this precipice, there's no way of backing up, walking away, or finding lower ground.
If I jump, will I plunge or fly?